Best Golf Spot

Two women were playing golf. One teed off and watched in horror as her
ball headed directly toward a foursome of men playing the next hole.
 The ball hit one of the men.  

He immediately clasped his hands together at his groin, fell to the ground and proceeded to roll around in agony.
 

The woman rushed down to the man, and immediately began to apologize, 
 “please allow me to help. I’m a physical therapist and I know I could
relieve your pain if  you’d allow me,” she told him.  

“Oh, no, I’ll be all right.  I’ll be fine in a few minutes“  the man replied. 

He was in obvious agony, lying in the fetal position, still clasping his hands together at his groin.  

At her persistence, however, he finally allowed her to help.  

She gently took his hands away and laid them to the side, loosened his pants and put her hands inside.  

She administered tender and artful massage for several long moments and asked, “How does that
>feel?”  

He replied, “It feels great ………but my thumb still hurts like hell !” 

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January Golf Sale

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Improve your swing, play some of the greatest golf courses in the world, watch the video to learn about this great golf gift.

By Joe Sharkey

The chip shot is one that a lot of golfers have trouble with, during any round lots of shots can be lost because of our inability to play this shot, I know from my own form recently just what this has cost me!! So its back to the practice ground for me.

Here are a few basic tips on setting up, I will be producing more on this so please keep checking back.

During any given day playing golf, there will be times when you will have to use what is called the chip shot in order to hit the ball onto the green. In order to be successful at chipping the ball, you must set your stance up correctly.

Chip shots are made by taking a stance that will put you close to the target line, so that your eyes are directly over it. The closer to the target line you are, the better the chance you have of moving the club back and hitting straight through to your target.

A Matter Of Preference

The stance you choose is largely dependent upon your personal preferences. You should feel comfortable and balanced. Try opening up your stance a bit as it may allow you to see better down the target line, thus making it easier to swing the clubhead at the intended target. When you are comfortable with your setup, your confidence increases.

Setting Up The Ball

The ball should be positioned in the middle of your stance when making a chip shot. It makes it easier for the clubhead to swing right along the target line, and at the appropriate angle. If you move the ball backwards in your stance, it will fly lower, and moving it up a bit will cause the ball to pop higher. However, chip shots do not require any adjusting of the ball, just set up right in the middle.

Proper Weight Distribution

Your weight should be dominating through the center of your stance. This position offers perfect balance and allows you to naturally open yourself to the target. In other words, your front shoulder and toe should be slightly left, or right, of where they would normally be positioned when addressing the ball.

Generally speaking, if you need the ball to fly higher, additional weight should be placed on the front foot. For right-handed golfers, the more weight that is put on the left side, the more the club will swing up as opposed to back, and low to the grass.

Chip shots normally require the ball to fly low with a decent roll. Therefore, the best weight distribution tactic is to keep your balance and all of your weight in the middle of your stance throughout the entire swing.

The Shoulders

If your stance is open, as instructed, then your shoulders should naturally open up or angle slightly to the left of the target. You should be close to the ball so that you can look over and down towards the target line.

The Grip

Remember that the chip is not a strength or power shot. When gripping the club before your swing, you may have the tendency to tighten up too much. Try to resist this urge because too much pressure on the club can make you tense, thereby ruining the shot. A lighter grip on the club will enable you to feel the ball hitting the blade. Your focus should be on touch, not on power.

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Some Basic Golf Rules

 By Joe Sharkey 

Getting to know the golf rules is an important part of learning to play the game, just watch the professionals in tournament play and how often they are looking for a ruling.  Here are just a few simple but important rules. 

Golf has so many rules and regulations, built over hundreds of years, that a manual was created and is updated yearly, courtesy of the United States Golf Association and the R & A 

Below are a few basic rules that concern the golf ball when in play:

1. Once the ball makes its way to the putting green, the rules state that you are allowed to mark the its position. The benefits of marking the ball’s spot is so that you can pick it up and clean it thoroughly so as to avoid interfering with your next shot. Second, if your ball is in the same target line of another player’s ball located farther away, picking the ball up will reduce the chance of ruining that player’s putt.

2. Another rule concerning the ball when it hits the putting green is that you must remove the flagstick to avoid a penalty.

3. You must always play your ball from the correct putting green. There may be times when you hit a shot and the ball lands on another hole’s green that is not your own. If this happens, you must pick up the ball and drop it at the nearest location of relief.

You can check the latest rule changes in the post on this site.

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A father, son and grandson went to the country club for their weekly round of golf. Just as they reached the first tee, a beautiful young blonde woman carrying her bag of clubs approached them. She explained that the member who brought her to the club for a round of golf had an emergency that called him away and asked the trio whether she can join them.
 
Naturally, the guys all agreed. Smiling, the blonde thanked them and said, “Look, fellows, I work in a topless bar as a dancer, so nothing shocks me anymore. If any of you want to smoke cigars, have a beer, bet, swear, tell off-color stories or do anything that you normally do when playing a round together, go ahead. But I enjoy playing golf, consider myself pretty good at it, so don’t try to coach me on how to play my shots.”
 

With that the guys agreed to relax and invited her to drive first.

All eyes were fastened on her shapely behind as she bent to place her ball on the tee. She then took her driver and hit the ball 270 yards down the middle, right in front of the green.
The father’s mouth was agape. “That was beautiful,” he said. The blonde put her driver away and said, “I really didn’t get into it, and I have faded it a little.” After the three guys hit their drives and their second shots, the blonde took out an eight iron and lofted the ball within five feet of the hole (She was closest to the pin.)
The son said, “Damn, lady, you played that perfectly.”
 
The blonde frowned and said, “It was a little weak, but even an easy seven would have been too much club. I’ve left a tricky little putt.” She then tapped in the five-footer for a birdie.
 
Having the honour, she drove first at the second hole, knocked the hell out of the ball, and it landed nearly 300 yards away smack in the middle of the fairway.
 
For the rest of the round the statuesque blonde continued to amaze the guys, quietly and methodically shooting for par or less on every hole.
 
When they arrived at the 18th green, the blonde was three under par, and had a very nasty 12-foot putt on an undulating green for a par.

She turned to the three guys and said, “I really want to thank you all for not acting like a bunch of chauvinists and telling me what club to use or how to play a shot, but I need this putt for a 69 and I’d really like to break 70 on this course. If any one of you can tell me how to make par on this hole, I’ll take him back to my apartment, pour some 35-year-old Single Malt Strathmill Scotch in him, fix him a steak dinner and then show him a very good time the rest of the night.
 
The yuppie son jumped at the thought! He strolled across the green, carefully eying the line of the putt and finally said, “Honey, aim about 6 inches to the right of the hole and hit it firm. It will get over that little hump and break right into the cup.
 
The father knelt down and sighted the putt using his putter as a plumb. Don’t listen to the kid, darlin’, you want to hit it softly 10 inches to the right and let it run left down that little hogback, so it falls into the cup.
 
The old gray-haired grandfather walked over to the blonde’s ball, picked it up and handed it to her and said, “That’s a gimme,  sweetheart.”
 
The blonde smiled and said, “Your car or mine?”
 
 
OLD AGE AND TREACHERY WILL OVERCOME SKILL AND YOUTHFUL VITALITY EVERY TIME.!!

You can find some great golf articles here

 Probably the amateur/ weekend golfers most feared shot. Here is the first in a short series of tips which may help you improve your bunker technique. By Joe Sharkey 

Bunker Shot – Changing Your Ball Position Can Be An Effective Bunker Strategy 

More advanced golf players have the advantage of doing some creative things with the position of the ball when setting up for a bunker shot.

For the rest of us, it’s best to stick with the basics and play the ball in the middle of the stance, until the shot can be mastered. Once you can step foot into a bunker with 100% confidence that you can make the ball onto the green, you are then ready for more advanced techniques.

Although you may not be ready for such advanced bunker shots, you may be faced with unplanned circumstances. Some bunker shots may not allow you to take an even stance with the ball positioned in the middle, like the following two scenarios:

Downhill Bunker Shots:

If you are facing a downhill bunker shot, you must move the ball slightly behind center within your stance to be sure that the ball flies up. The reason is  because gravity will naturally pull it down.

Uphill Bunker Shots: 

 When dealing with an uphill bunker shot, move the ball slightly forward of the center to ensure that you splash the sand in the front of the ball.

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The USGA and the R&A have announced new rule changes for 2008you can check them out here

Rule Changes

A Woman was out golfing one day when she hit her ball into the woods.
She went into the woods to look for it and found a frog in a trap. The Frog
said to her, “If you release me from this trap, I will grant you three
wishes.”
The woman freed the frog, and the frog said, “Thank you, but I failed to
mention that there was a condition to your wishes. Whatever you wish for,your husband will get ……. times ten!”

The woman said,”That’s okay.” For her first wish, she wanted to be the most beautiful woman in the world.

The frog warned her, “You do realize that this wish will also make your husband the most handsome man that ever lived, an Adonis whom women will swoon over and flock to”.

The woman replied, “That’s okay, because I will be the most beautiful Woman and he will have eyes only for me.”

So, KAZAM!!! - She’s the most beautiful Woman in the world!

For her second wish, she wanted to be the richest woman in the world.

The frog said,” That will make your husband the richest man in the worldby
far. And he will be ten times richer than you. “The woman said,

“That’s okay, because what’s mine is his and what’s his is mine.”

So, KAZAM!!! - She’s the richest woman in the world!

The frog then inquired about her third wish, and after
carefulconsideration

she answered, “I’d like a mild heart attack.”

Moral of the story: Women are clever. Don’t mess with them.

ATTENTION female readers: This is the end of the joke for you.

Stop hereandcontinue feeling good.

Male readers: Please scroll down.

The man had a heart attack ten times milder than his wife!!!

Moral of the story: Women are really dumb but think they’re reallysmart.

Let them continue to think that way and just enjoy the show.

PS: If you are a woman and are still reading this; it only goes to

show that women are nosey cows and never listen!!!

Forward this to all the guys for a good laugh, and to all the ladies who

have a good sense of humour.

Feel free to contribute your favourite golf joke here, please keep them clean